In case you’re still a little vague on the whole “cloned dinosaurs run amok on a tropical island” concept, we’ve assembled a quick guide to the Jurassic Park movies to get you up to speed. Spoilers ahoy!
Jurassic Park The first, and arguably best, of Spielberg’s dino-thrillers awed and terrified millions in the summer of 1993 with its rampaging tyrannosaurs, crafty ‘raptors, magnificent brachiosaurs, and non-stop human-against-dinosaur action. When an evaluation team’s safari through the brand-new Jurassic Park falls victim to sabotage, the dinosaurs break loose, and do what comes naturally—mostly eating people. The concept is beautifully simple: Modern humans face resurrected dinosaurs on a small tropical island. And, despite a few dialog groaners (I cringe every time Jeff Goldblum drips that water on Laura Dern’s hand), the 10-year-old film holds up quite well.
Most Photogenic Dino The initial appearance of the brachiosaurus—the first dinosaur both you and the heroes see in the movie—can still drop the jaw and bring a tear to the eye. And, they sing, too!
Best Dino-Snack Gennaro’s toilet run-in with the T-Rex (you know, the lawyer).
Most Shocking Casualty Samuel L. Jackson as park administrator Arnold, whose severed arm drops onto Laura Dern’s shoulder at a very bad time.
Best Dino-Villains The velociraptors. These small-pack predators seethe with all the menace of the shark from Jaws and with the intelligence, ferocity, and speed of the critters in the Alien pictures.
“Ooo, ah!” That’s how it always starts …
The Lost World: Jurassic Park Based loosely on Crichton’s second novel, The Lost World featured the return of Jeff Goldblum’s Ian Malcolm and Richard Attenborough’s John Hammond. Hammond, it seems, also built another facility near the first park, where most of the cloning and research work actually happened (and he couldn’t have mentioned this in the last movie because … ?). The place is now abandoned, and the dinosaurs are now free and interacting in a functioning ecosystem. Hammond wants Malcolm and his dino-behavior-scientist girlfriend (Julianne Moore) to go to this “Site B” on Isla Sorna and protect it from Hammond’s own company, which wants to pillage the island’s resources. Naturally, raptor hijinks and dino-danger ensue.
Most Photogenic Dino The Stegosaurus, a dinosaur not seen in the last film, stars in the nature documentary portion of this movie. They’re stunning and spiky.
Best Dino-Snack Peter “Woodchipper Guy from Fargo” Stormare goes down under a mob of compys—chicken-sized dinosaurs that swarm like piranhas.
Most Shocking Casualty Two tyrannosaurs clamp their jaws on the same guy at the same time, and decide to split the meal in a way that would make King Solomon proud.
Best Dino-Villains Tyranno-freakin-saurus Rex, baby! The angry daddy dino eats the entire crew of a cargo ship without (apparently) breaking out of the hold, as a captured T. Rex breaks free and then wreaks havoc on downtown San Diego in a thrilling homage to both King Kong and Godzilla.
T-Rex vs. Spino.
Jurassic Park III The third film saw Spielberg move into the producer’s seat, as action veteran Joe Johnston took the director’s helm. Sam Neill returns as Dr. Grant, finding life difficult in a world where live dinosaurs walk the earth. In need of money, he agrees to serve as aerial tour guide for William H. Macy and Tea Leoni. But, the pair has deceived Grant—they’ve actually lost their son on Isla Sorna, the “Lost World” that Grant’s never even seen. And, they’re not rich, either. But before Grant can say “pterosaur,” their small plane crashes, and the race for survival is on.
Most Photogenic Dino Only glimpsed briefly at the end of The Lost World, the sleek and pretty-winged reptile (technically, not a dinosaur), called pteranodon, soars over scenic vistas, searching for unwary prey. Honorable mention goes to the velociraptor and tyrannosaur redesigns, which reflect recent theories and discoveries.
Best Dino-Villain The Spinosaurus, an all-new (and not very well-known) giant predator, is the thing that tyrannosaurs fear.
Most Shocking Casualty Before the movie even reaches the halfway point, the Spinosaurus kills a mighty T. Rex by snapping its neck and proceeds to feast on the so-called tyrant lizard. Didn’t see that coming.
Best Dino-Snack Para-sailing over the lost world of Isla Sorna, two tourists lose sight of their tow boat behind a cloudbank. When the boat emerges, the deck is stained with blood and nobody’s driving. You don’t even know what did it, just that it was fast—and out on the water. D’oh!
