Deals on Wheels
Few gamers can forget the first time they hopped into a police car or a taxi cab in the original Grand Theft Auto 3 and found that with the click of a stick, you could earn loads of cash by hunting down criminals as a vigilante or delivering passengers from point A to point B (which also, it turned out, was an excellent way to get to know the huge Liberty City layout).
You talkin' to me? You talkin' tome?
Now Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas™ goes GTA 3 and Grand Theft Auto: Vice City one better—several better, in fact—with a wide selection of vehicle-based missions that go well beyond what was available in earlier games, as well as some returning favorites. In each case, once you perform a mission a certain number of times, your character CJ gets a permanent bonus—sometimes just a load of money, sometimes a boost to your cars, possibly even immunity from some kinds of damage.
The Boxville is your ticket to burgle.
Burglary
Burglary requires a big Boxville delivery van (the first time, Ryder is your guide and provides you with the vehicle). Once you have the mission you need to find a place to rob, and you can only find those after the sun goes down. Look for yellow markers indicating that you can get into the house (you might need to get pretty close, or even walk, to spot them). After finding one, get the Boxville close and sneak in. Inside the house, your goal is to be speedy but quiet. There's a noise meter that increases if you move any faster than a light press forward on the thumbstick. Find something to steal (indicated by the green triangle) and press the Y button to pick it up and go stash it in the van. Keep going back until you've cleaned the place out, then head back to the lockup—a storage space where you can park the Boxville and Ryder can fence the goods.
Keep it quiet when you're in the house.
Reward: The Burglary missions are complete when you make 10 grand off of the stolen merchandise, which is also your reward.
Get back to the Lockup before daylight!
Firefighting
Firefighting requires … wait for it … a fire truck! If there isn't one nearby, you can generally "call" a fire truck by causing an explosion or two, either with a car or old-fashioned explosives. After you're behind the wheel, click the right thumbstick to activate the mission, and look for the blue icon indicating a car fire. Pull the fire truck close to the flames (it's fireproof) and use the water cannon to put out the conflagration—and sometimes the burning former occupants. Don't kill anyone between fires—getting arrested while putting out a burning Faggio is humliatin'.
If you need a fire truck, start a fire. Or three.
Reward: You get cash for putting out fires. Once you reach firefighter level 12, the missions are over and CJ becomes as fireproof as the fire truck itself!
If you want an ambulance, start some violence.
Paramedic
Becoming a Paramedic is as easy as jacking an ambulance and clicking the right thumbstick. You have limited time to complete each rescue, and as your Paramedic level rises, you may even have to pick up a few at a time. Just pull up to the ailing victim, being extra-careful not to run over them (which goes for most vehicle missions), and wait for them to hop in. Turn on the siren and floor it, because you need to get back to the hospital before time runs out and the victim croaks.
Reward: Get to paramedic level 10 and your maximum health will get a big boost.
In this game, the ride pimpsyou!
Pimping
Pimping is definitely one of those things that will make the Concerned People Who Don't Actually Play Games But Want To Tell Us All What We Can Play (also known as the CPWDAPGBWTTUAWWCP) even more concerned. Nab yourself a Broadway "pimpmobile" (the low-rider that looks somewhat old-timey, all round fenders and whatnot) and click the stick, then get to your first pick-up. Find your prostitute, then take her to meet the trick in a secluded place. Drop her off, and you're off to the next girl. By the time you drop the second hooker off, the first one will probably be finished and ready to pick up. Make sure you're packing some heat—after the first few tricks, the johns tend to get violent or they refuse to pay, and it's your job as the pimp to settle things.
Pimpin' ain't easy – but it's profitable.
Reward: Money—pimps always get a big cut, and the higher your pimp level, the more money the trick pays, upping your percentage. Become a level 10 pimp to finish these missions and you get money whenever you … er … visit a streetwalker on your own. (Man, I hope my mom isn't reading this.)
You'd be amazed what fits in that garage.
These are just a few of the vehicular missions you can play inGTA: San Andreas. There are also the tried and true Vigilante and Taxi Driver jobs, which involve hunting down criminals and driving fares about town, respectively. A much bigger addition is the Trucking missions, which have tougher prerequisites than the others and entail driving all over the state making deliveries. Finish the trucking missions and you get your own trucking company that pulls in a cool two Gs every day. Don't forget you can save vehicles in your garage (and not just one, but as many as will fit—I managed to stuff a Broadway, a fire truck,and a bicycle in there) so you always have a quick way to make some cash.
The sheer variety of things to drive in GTA: San Andreasis what makes the game so irresistible. Other vehicles include motorcycles, aircraft, boats, and even a hovercraft. Who said crime doesn't pay?
By Danny Chihdo
