Xbox Dad:
Getting Your Valentine to Game
Published February 8, 2008
I have a few friends who game with their wives, but for the most part it's not an activity that gets shared with your partner. It seems inappropriate to say that this is mostly a problem for husbands, and that wives don't tend to like to play videogames or at least they don't like to play them as much, but I think that's often the case. Either way though, if you like to game and your significant other doesn't, then I have some ideas for you. It might just be me, but the idea of getting my wife into a game like Mass Effect™ is very appealing, so you and I need to figure out the best way to make that happen.
Because nothing says "I love you" like a game of co-op Gears of War.
Increase the Comfort Level
If your partner doesn't normally play games on Xbox 360®, I bet they wouldn't even consider going and firing it up to try out a game. The key is to make sure they are comfortable using the console without you, that they know how to get into all the right places (where to find the Xbox LIVE® Arcade games for example) and that there is nothing intimidating about getting it all up and running.
Xbox Dad's wife is intrigued by Mass Effect.
Around our house that means a few key things. First, we use our console to watch TV shows (from the Video Store), to watch DVDs, and even to watch video files off a USB thumb drive, or to view photos from our camera. Second, I have Xbox 360 set to auto login (if you have kids, make sure the profile set to auto login is configured appropriately for their use), to avoid any momentary "I guess I need Duncan to tell me what profile to pick" comments. A little bump in the road like that could mean the difference between gaming and non-gaming for some people. Remember they aren't all that motivated to play a game in the first place, so you must remove all the obstacles along the way. Finally, I decided to invest in a good universal remote (one of the Harmony models from Logitech) that has a big clear button that says "Play Xbox 360" on it. Having to know what input to use on the TV, or how to turn on the stereo for sound are just more reasons to give up when trying to play a game.
Find the Right Games
I don't know about your wife or husband, but my wife doesn't have any real desire to play, or even to watch me play, Halo® 3. On the other hand, she's watched me play both The Elder Scrolls® IV: Oblivion™ and Mass Effect, and has been completely distracted from the book she was trying to read, so I know there's hope!
I'm not going to go for a big game right off the bat though. I want to ease her into gaming. The main reason my wife gives for her lack of interest in videogames is that she doesn't want to spend the time. In that case, a casual arcade style game is the perfect "gateway game." Games like Bejeweled® 2 or Hexic™ 2 appeal to a wide variety of people, they have a low barrier to entry because they are easy to learn, and they don't require a huge time investment. Combine those features with addictive gameplay and they are perfect for our purposes.
Hexic 2, and indeed, most of the LIVE Arcade games, are great gateway games.
A game with a lesser learning curve has the benefit of preventing frustration, and avoiding the feeling of being completely outmatched when playing with someone who plays videogames all the time (you). I've also found that a lot of non-gamers like the driving games, such as Project Gotham Racing® 4, because driving is already a familiar concept to them. Along the same lines, to get my Mom to play Xbox, I went straight to Links® 2004 because the familiar concept of golf balanced out the very unfamiliar experience of using a videogame controller.
For some people it isn't about time or the learning curve, they prefer a more social experience, and they don't count playing against eight strangers in Halo 3 on Xbox LIVE as "social." Party games like Scene It?® Lights, Camera, Action, Viva Piñata®: Party Animals and others are perfect for a videogaming night with friends. Another example is Rock Band™. It has its social side if you have a few people around to play together, but there's a solo gaming side as well to ease them into videogaming, and it's a lot of fun.
Results May Vary
I wouldn't recommend planning a romantic evening on February 14 around videogames, but it's definitely time to start working on that long term goal of becoming a videogaming couple. Play some casual games in front of your wife or husband, ask if they'd like to play (sure, they'll say no … but you've brought up the idea of them playing) and maybe think about getting another couple over to play Scene It? or Rock Band.
There are a few things I wouldn't do. Don't barter along the lines of "I'll watch that woodworking show that you love if you'll play a round of Halo with me." Don't point out that your hot co-worker really likes to game. Jealousy is definitely a motivator, but it usually doesn't work out well for you. And don't be too disappointed if it just doesn't work and they don't end up picking the controller. Hopefully, finding a gaming partner wasn't the reason you started dating them in the first place!
I really want your feedback, so shoot me an e-mail, or jump over to the Gamer Parents & Family Gaming forum and post a thread (I'm watching for ones with Xbox Dad in the title)!
Article by Duncan Festive Turkey Mackenzie
